No one would choose a friendless existence on condition of having all the other things in the world.

For how many things, which for our own sake we should never do, do we perform for the sake of our friends.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?

I remember when I was in high school I didn’t have a new dress for each special occasion. The girls would bring the fact to my attention, not always too delicately. The boys, however, never bothered with the subject. They were my friends, not because of the size of my wardrobe but because they liked me.

Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one.

I think we all change each other’s paths. I don’t know which law idea that is in physics, but I don’t think any of us can live without affecting one another.

I feel like if you’re a really good human being, you can try to find something beautiful in every single person, no matter what.

Consider the fellow. He never spends his time telling you about his previous night’s date. You get the idea he has eyes only for you and wouldn’t think of looking at another woman.

A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all people. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick.

Friendship with ones self is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.

I spend a lot of time just, you know, with my girlfriend and my dog. And I mean, we don’t have a lot of furniture in our house, so it’s really simple. And we’re trying to build products for everyone in the world, right. And you don’t want to get isolated to do that.

My fans saw me get engaged, saw me make that woman my wife, me having kids, me divorcing, me talking about divorce before the divorce, me talking about my kids‘ reaction to that divorce.

Remember that the most valuable antiques are dear old friends.

Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence.

No one loves the man whom he fears.

I think, a lot of times when you meet someone, you feel like you need to appear like you’re not interested in them so that they’ll be more interested in you. But what happens when you start showing him that you actually like him? What’s he gonna do then? Play the tape forward; how do you keep a guy like that? I don’t want to sign up for that.

We never love a person, but only qualities.

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animal.

I met my husband before I became a star, and he doesn’t care about any of it.

Some people love so hard that they can’t control those emotions when they’re at their deepest point.

I’ve always wanted male friends that I could be real intimate with and talk about important things with and be as affectionate with that person as I would be with a girl.

Talk well of the absent whenever you have the opportunity.

Men get to be a mixture of the charming mannerisms of the women they have known.

It’s fun to be hopelessly in love. It’s dangerous, but it’s fun.

More than anything else, I want the folks back at home to think right of me.

Misfortune shows those who are not really friends.

I know love is the answer.

I like working. That’s when I’m feeling my best. And the people around me know that. My wife knows that.

Trying to meet new women, it’s always a little more difficult as opposed to calling somebody I knew that’s single and trying to rebuild that connection.

We do not know what love is. We know the symptoms of it, the pleasure, the pain, the fear, the anxiety and so on. We try to solve the symptoms, which becomes a wandering in darkness. We spend our days and nights in this, and it is soon over in death.

Few friendships would survive if each one knew what his friend says of him behind his back.

The loss of young first love is so painful that it borders on the ludicrous.

It is necessary to fall in love… if only to provide an alibi for all the random despair you are going to feel anyway.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Every parting gives a foretaste of death, every reunion a hint of the resurrection.

Every man can tell how many goats or sheep he possesses, but not how many friends.

Though lovers be lost, love shall not.

Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.

‚Tis strange what a man may do, and a woman yet think him an angel.

Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light.

My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.

The secret to a long marriage is to stay gone.

It is much more secure to be feared than to be loved.

You’re unlikely to discover something new without a lot of practice on old stuff, but further, you should get a heck of a lot of fun out of working out funny relations and interesting things.

The mind of a 19-year-old is very different from the mind of a 26-year-old. You grow. You get into better relationships. You experience more, meet more people, better people. But when you’re in a dark hole at an earlier point in your life – you write about the mindset you’re in at that moment.

You have to give others the opportunity to love who you love. If they don’t accept it, it’s their loss.

The rule of friendship means there should be mutual sympathy between them, each supplying what the other lacks and trying to benefit the other, always using friendly and sincere words.

The only service a friend can really render is to keep up your courage by holding up to you a mirror in which you can see a noble image of yourself.

We have to distrust each other. It is our only defense against betrayal.

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.

To be loved is very demoralizing.

It’s so much easier to like people, and to let people in, to trust them until they prove that you should do otherwise. The alternative is being an iceberg.

By taking a second wife he pays the highest compliment to the first, by showing that she made him so happy as a married man, that he wishes to be so a second time.

Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.

We can learn to see each other and see ourselves in each other and recognize that human beings are more alike than we are unalike.

No matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it.

Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.

The problem with me, as far as getting married and having a family, is that my comedy is so important to me. So I don’t know if I’ll ever be as good a dad as my dad.

Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.

A bad man is the sort who weeps every time he speaks of a good woman.

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.