I’ve got four dogs, and I just don’t do dog doo. I’m a diva when it comes to that.

Writers are lampposts and critics are dogs. Ask lampposts what they think about dogs. Does the dog hurt the lamppost?

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

Histories are more full of examples of the fidelity of dogs than of friends.

I let the dog out, or I let him in, and we talk some. I let him know I like him, and he lets me know he likes me.

When the dog looks at you, the dog is not thinking what kind of a person you are. The dog is not judging you.

A real Christian is a person who can give his pet parrot to the town gossip.

Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are God. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are God.

I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone.

You cannot share your life with a dog, as I had done in Bournemouth, or a cat, and not know perfectly well that animals have personalities and minds and feelings.

I’m an introvert… I love being by myself, love being outdoors, love taking a long walk with my dogs and looking at the trees, flowers, the sky.

The dog that trots about finds a bone.

Dogs never bite me – just humans.

I’ve seen a look in dogs‘ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.

Dogs and philosophers do the greatest good and get the fewest rewards.

I learned from my dog long before I went to Gombe that we weren’t the only beings with personalities. What the chimps did was help me to persuade others.

Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.

Pooper scooper? Yeah, I’ve done it a few times. Every once in a while, you have to.

I really want a pet, and I really love animals.

I love pets, especially dogs.

I love dogs, but dogs, you have to be in the country with dogs. I cannot walk a dog on the street.

This morning I lay in the bathtub thinking how wonderful it would be if I had a dog like Rin Tin Tin. I’d call him Rin Tin Tin too, and I’d take him to school with me, where he could stay in the janitor’s room or by the bicycle racks when the weather was good.