It’s really fun to be on stage in front of people.

I know some of the best Dolly Parton jokes. I made ‚em up myself.

I want to play a fireman and a spy. I want to learn special effects.

Some of my foster families used to send me to the movies to get me out of the house and there I’d sit all day and way into the night. Up in front, there with the screen so big, a little kid all alone, and I loved it. I loved anything that moved up there and I didn’t miss anything that happened and there was no popcorn either.

The best book, like the best speech, will do it all – make us laugh, think, cry and cheer – preferably in that order.

Movies can and do have tremendous influence in shaping young lives in the realm of entertainment towards the ideals and objectives of normal adulthood.

I don’t get bored.

‚The Simpsons‘ appearances were great fun. But I don’t take them too seriously. I think ‚The Simpsons‘ have treated my disability responsibly.

Acting is the perfect idiot’s profession.

I think that more flow of information, the ability to stay connected to more people makes people more effective as people. And I mean, that’s true socially. It makes you have more fun, right. It feels better to be more connected to all these people. You have a richer life.

There are a lot of inaccuracies out there when it comes to the SEAL training process. You will see guys carrying logs around on television. They think that the hardest part about being on a SEAL team is getting through that training. The fact of the matter is, if you have a good attitude, that training is fun. I had a blast.

Music was an experience, intimately married to your life. You could pay to hear music, but after you did, it was over, gone – a memory.

The greatest thing about being a comedian is knowing other comedians. And you get to talk to them. Its the most fun.

I’d just as soon play tennis with the net down.

I love being on stage, I love being able to tell a story, I love the fact that the audience listens and laughs at it. It makes me happy, and it’s what I live for.

PowerPoint makes us stupid.

Of course, it does depend on the people, but sometimes I’m invited places to kind of brighten up a dinner table like a musician who’ll play the piano after dinner, and I know you’re not really invited for yourself. You’re just an ornament.

I can move any crowd.

When I do stand-up shows at colleges, girls will talk to me after the show, and that always feels good. I like talking to them.

Besides entertainment and action, I want to educate. You know, as a producer or director, we do have a responsibility to society.

I sell escapism.

It’s really fun to put yourself into a character – into shoes you wouldn’t normally be in.

My philosophy is, it’s always very rewarding when you can make an audience laugh. I don’t mind making fun of myself. I like self-deprecating comedy. But I’d like you to laugh with me occasionally, too.

I realised a little bit to my astonishment that I can give a lecture for a thousand people, and there will be this tumultuous applause, so, you know, I have the feeling well, it can’t be all that bad.

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

At first, I wasn’t really keen on the idea of me being on stage having to sing in front of people.

Movies are a fad. Audiences really want to see live actors on a stage.

Since childhood, I’ve been a clown. I’ve always liked being very funny or trying to make people laugh. It’s my original self.

When you make as many speeches and you talk as much as I do and you get away from the text, it’s always a possibility to get a few words tangled here and there.

Maybe I’ll give Broadway a try. But you know what would be great? Hosting the Oscars. I promise you, that would be a show no one forgot.

It’s fun to be hopelessly in love. It’s dangerous, but it’s fun.

As we all know, sequels can be tricky.

Well, Howard Stern has been doing his impression of me for years. It doesn’t really bother me.

Some of the furor that surrounded a Harry Potter publication was fun.

The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk like you because it’s so much fun.

I’ve always wanted to do a family movie.

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.

Wherever I go meeting the public… spreading a message of human values, spreading a message of harmony, is the most important thing.

Take advantage of every opportunity to practice your communication skills so that when important occasions arise, you will have the gift, the style, the sharpness, the clarity, and the emotions to affect other people.

It’s much more fun to play something you’re nothing like than what you are… It’s much easier to hide yourself in a character.

It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

Nothing is so intolerable to man as being fully at rest, without a passion, without business, without entertainment, without care.

WWE is a space where I thrived, and I loved, and I still do. I love connecting with an audience; that is the greatest thing about going back to WWE.

I got my buzz from playing.

I’ve been reading tabloids since I was nine. I love a good story.

I’ve spent too much time giving speeches, traveling the world.

Everybody is entertained to death.

You think I’m going to ask these sweet 14 year olds to ask their parents to buy a $100 ticket then run around in latex and lip sync? No way.

I’m always amazed by the people who work on stage who sing night after night, day after day, week in week out.

I don’t want people at my shows to come out and say, ‚I just saw a cool show.‘ I want them to say, ‚I had fun at the show.‘ I want it to be a collaborative thing and be part of the audience and have them be part of me. I try to interact with everyone there and have them be equal to me because they are.

I liked school, but I used to dread those moments when the teacher would call me up to give an oral report. I forced myself to deal with it and not dwell on the class in front of me – to keep a straight face, give the report and concentrate on getting it right. That’s normally how I perform. That’s how I am.

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? And the rest of you, if you’ll just rattle your jewelry.

The mark of a true politician is that he is never at a loss for words because he is always half-expecting to be asked to make a speech.

Dreaming about being an actress, is more exciting then being one.

I am a giant proponent of giant screens. But I accept the fact that most of my movies are going to be seen on phones.

Stand-up comedy is mine: it’s my entity; it’s my brand; I own it. I do it when I want to do it.

Well, everyone likes movies when they’re a little kid.

I really like children to watch my movies.

I’m a pretty funny guy, and I would love to do a comedy with a bunch of funny guys – movie-star guys, where they could help me through it.

In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time.

I make pop culture.