I’ll tell you one thing, since I’m married, single people look absolutely ridiculous to me.

We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.

We should not say that one man’s hour is worth another man’s hour, but rather that one man during an hour is worth just as much as another man during an hour. Time is everything, man is nothing: he is at the most time’s carcass.

It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other.

When I was with Andy Warhol, I thought, ‚God, his wig looks cheaper than mine!‘

A man has a tendency to accept you the way you are, while most women immediately start to pick flaws and want to change you.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute.

I thank God I’m myself and for the life I’m given to live and for friends and lovers and beloveds, and I thank God for knowing that all those people have already paid for me.

A letdown is worth a few songs. A heartbreak is worth a few albums.

It’s the niceties that make the difference fate gives us the hand, and we play the cards.

On the outskirts of every agony sits some observant fellow who points.

Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities.

Part of the reason for the ugliness of adults, in a child’s eyes, is that the child is usually looking upwards, and few faces are at their best when seen from below.

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I’ll forgive Thy great big joke on me.

In the Western Church to which I belong, priests cannot be married as in the Byzantine, Ukrainian, Russian or Greek Catholic Churches. In those churches, the priests can be married, but the bishops have to be celibate. They are very good priests.

I am not gay, but if I were, I would be the first one running out of the closet.

You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

Complaining is dangerous business. It can damage or even destroy your relationship with God, your relationships with other people, and even with your relationship with yourself.

Perhaps people like us cannot love. Ordinary people can – that is their secret.

It is the duty of every thoughtful Indian not to marry. In case he is helpless in regard to marriage, he should abstain from sexual intercourse with his wife.

Happiness is a how; not a what. A talent, not an object.

I mean… in life… what relationship is easy?

I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it’s never at the expense of the other guy.

A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

I don’t feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.

My father was a mean, controlling and manipulative person for most of his life. He was unpredictable and unstable.

Perhaps, as some wit remarked, the best proof that there is Intelligent Life in Outer Space is the fact it hasn’t come here. Well, it can’t hide forever – one day we will overhear it.

It’s lack that gives us inspiration. It’s not fullness.

There is no such thing as society: there are individual men and women, and there are families.

Youth is wasted on the young.

I will never be happy without having someone. Going to sleep alone kills me.

I’m more of an adventurous type than a relationship type.

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.

We’re not trying to make you less of a man. We just want you to love us as deeply and as wholesomely and as fully as we love you.

Take my wife… Please!

People say I look so happy – and I say, ‚That’s the Botox.‘

Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.

In terms of the legal matter of creating a contract between two people that’s called marriage, and allowing them to live together with the protection of law, it seems to me is the way we should be moving in this country.

Not only is there but one way of doing things rightly, but there is only one way of seeing them, and that is, seeing the whole of them.

For me, it’s about the way I carry myself and the way I treat other people. My relationship and how I feel about God and what He does for me, is something deeply personal. It’s where I came from, my family, I was brought up in a religious household and that’s very important to me.

Every man’s life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.

For my part, I consider that it will be found much better by all parties to leave the past to history, especially as I propose to write that history myself.

We all die, we all get sick, we all feel hunger and lust and pain, and therefore human life is consistent from one generation to the other. We all – most of us, anyway – want connections with other people and spend our lives looking for them.

It’s not that I’m afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

I always keep my guard up with guys and I guess that can get in the way sometimes. I can make them go through hell.

One who deceives will always find those who allow themselves to be deceived.

Every once in a while I get the highly inappropriate proposal which is like, ‚Wow, Really! You don’t even know me and I don’t know you at all, and you want that to happen? Tonight? Ok, I get off work at 7.30.‘

Wisdom I know is social. She seeks her fellows. But Beauty is jealous, and illy bears the presence of a rival.

What I have never been afraid of is to be a little silly, and you can engage people that way. My view is, first you get them to laugh, then you get them to listen.

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.

I can’t deal with someone wanting to take a relationship backward or needing space or cheating on you.

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity.

My husband calls me ‚catfish.‘ He says I’m all mouth and no brains.

As unique as we all are, an awful lot of us want the same things. We want to shake up our current less-than-fulfilling lives. We want to be happier, more loving, forgiving and connected with the people around us.

Through my research, I found that vulnerability is the glue that holds relationships together. It’s the magic sauce.

People who have given us their complete confidence believe that they have a right to ours. The inference is false, a gift confers no rights.

Go up close to your friend, but do not go over to him! We should also respect the enemy in our friend.

Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh from beginning to end.

The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not so much a war as an endless standing in line.