If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.

The place where you made your stand never mattered. Only that you were there… and still on your feet.

I’m not this horrible, evil person.

Well I think a lot of times we’re putting things off and I’m going to do it later. I’m going to break this bad habit or I’m going to pursue this dream or I’m going to treat my spouse better.

Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world.

We’re not a fragile people. We’re not a frightful people. Our power doesn’t come from some self-declared savior promising that he alone can restore order as long as we do things his way. We don’t look to be ruled.

I try to not focus on what people expect from me.

Everything in the world may be endured except continual prosperity.

I’ve always found, give me a pack of cigarettes and a couple of beers, and I do better with that than I do with torture.

I always have an optimistic view, no matter what it is.

I’ve 20,000 hours of clinical practice; you’re not naive after the first few thousand. I’ve helped people deal with things that most people can’t imagine.

If you spend your life competing with business men, what do you have? A bank account and ulcers!

It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.

I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.

Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others.

As pessimistic as I am about the nature of human beings and our capacity for atrocity and malevolence and betrayal and laziness and inertia, and all those things, I think we can transcend all that and set things straight.

The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn’t still be a farmer.

I wouldn’t ever say if you’re having tough times then there must be something wrong with you or your attitude. Life’s a fight. It’s a good fight of faith. I encourage people to stay up, stay hopeful, stay faith-filled.

No crime is so great as daring to excel.

In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher.

Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still knows where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

Character is destiny.

Forty is when you actually begin even deserving to be on stage telling people what you think.

Be careless in your dress if you must, but keep a tidy soul.

I almost laughed about the Machiavellian plans of the presidents of the United States.

Because your own strength is unequal to the task, do not assume that it is beyond the powers of man; but if anything is within the powers and province of man, believe that it is within your own compass also.

When you’re finished changing, you’re finished.

The U. S. Constitution doesn’t guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself.

Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic – you need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner.

Get mad, then get over it.

Only the insecure strive for security.

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‚Where’s the self-help section?‘ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

What we think determines what happens to us, so if we want to change our lives, we need to stretch our minds.

Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken.

No work or love will flourish out of guilt, fear, or hollowness of heart, just as no valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living now.

There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere, and many of us will have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death again and again before we reach the mountaintop of our desires.

To endure is the first thing that a child ought to learn, and that which he will have the most need to know.

What I want for my fans and for the world, for anyone who feels pain, is to lean into that pain and embrace it as much as they can and begin the healing process.

Life is a gamble. You can get hurt, but people die in plane crashes, lose their arms and legs in car accidents; people die every day. Same with fighters: some die, some get hurt, some go on. You just don’t let yourself believe it will happen to you.

If small things have the power to disturb you, then who you think you are is exactly that: small.

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.

We are all sculptors and painters, and our material is our own flesh and blood and bones. Any nobleness begins at once to refine a man’s features, any meanness or sensuality to imbrute them.

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.

I think a big test we all face in life on a regular basis is that discouragement test. Life’s not always fair, but I believe if you keep doing the right thing, God will get you to where you are.

People say you have to hit rock bottom, and, I can tell you, almost dying is as rock bottom as it gets.

Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

There was a time when people said, ‚Jim, if you keep on making faces, your face will freeze like that.‘ Now they just say, ‚Pay him!‘

There are two ways of being happy: We must either diminish our wants or augment our means – either may do – the result is the same and it is for each man to decide for himself and to do that which happens to be easier.

Fear is stupid. So are regrets.

It’s a funny old world.

I think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Do not think of your faults, still less of other’s faults; look for what is good and strong, and try to imitate it. Your faults will drop off, like dead leaves, when their time comes.

Adversity has ever been considered the state in which a man most easily becomes acquainted with himself.

It is necessary for me to establish a winner image. Therefore, I have to beat somebody.

As a leader, the first person I need to lead is me. The first person that I should try to change is me.

Some men can live up to their loftiest ideals without ever going higher than a basement.

I think everybody’s trying to get to a place in themselves where they conquer what they was afraid of; they achieve some of their life goals, kept their word about what they were trying to do.

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

I’m not a bad person.

You need to overcome the tug of people against you as you reach for high goals.