To change ones life: Start immediately. Do it flamboyantly.

Remember that no relationship is a total waste of time. You can always learn something about yourself.

Begin to be now what you will be hereafter.

Every morning I jump out of bed and step on a landmine. The landmine is me. After the explosion, I spent the rest of the day putting the pieces together.

Blessed are the forgetful: for they get the better even of their blunders.

I hate the past – especially my own past.

I like to use the hard times in the past to motivate me today.

I may not be where I want to be, but thank God I am not where I used to be.

Any man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man.

Overcoming my dad telling me that I could never amount to anything is what has made me the megalomaniac that you see today.

Every man I meet is in some way my superior.

Live to learn, and you will really learn to live.

If everything was perfect, you would never learn and you would never grow.

I was born. When I was 23 I started telling jokes. Then I started going on television and doing films. That’s still what I am doing. The end.

My life turned out to be beyond my greatest dreams.

It is easier to stay out than get out.

As long as you live, keep learning how to live.

Do the best you can, and don’t take life too serious.

I do sometimes look back at things I’ve written in the past, and think, ‚I just don’t remember being the person who wrote that.‘

You stay teachable most by reading books. By reading what other people went through.

We don’t mature momentarily, but over the long-term.

As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others.

Don’t work for recognition, but do work worthy of recognition.

Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for them.

Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today.

You drown not by falling into a river, but by staying submerged in it.

All of my favorite people – people I really trust – none of them were cool in their younger years.

The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don’t let it get the best of you.

Any action is often better than no action, especially if you have been stuck in an unhappy situation for a long time. If it is a mistake, at least you learn something, in which case it’s no longer a mistake. If you remain stuck, you learn nothing.

If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.

Start with what is right rather than what is acceptable.

If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

Live your life, do your work, then take your hat.

As you get older, you’re not afraid of doubt. Doubt isn’t running the show. You take out all the self-agonizing.