There’s something about being in front of a live audience that’s fun. It’s a really interesting, very electric, very alive, and intense experience, and you can’t get it anywhere else. And I’ve been doing it since I was 23, so it’s part of my being – it’s part of my fabric as a person.

Learning about climate change triggered my depression in the first place. But it was also what got me out of my depression, because there were things I could do to improve the situation. I don’t have time to be depressed anymore.

All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.

‚Two Voices,‘ from my album with Peter Schwalm, is an intact dream-poem. I awoke one night with an image of a piece of paper and all the words of the poem written on it, so I just blundered down to the kitchen table and ‚copied it out.‘

My show ‚The Big House‘ was picked up; they flew me to New York. I’m about to step on stage to announce Kevin Hart’s ‚The Big House.‘ And a hand grabs my shoulder, ‚Kevin no, they just decided to cancel it.‘ It’s a serious smack-in-the-face business, and either you can take it, or you can’t.

I don’t have the best track record with quotes.

Every man has his own courage, and is betrayed because he seeks in himself the courage of other persons.

I don’t control my writing – it controls me.

I try never to wear my own clothes, I pretend I’m someone else.

And above all things, never think that you’re not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning.

You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.

The celebrity-chef thing, even at its worst, its most annoying, its silliest, its goofiest, its most egregious and cynical, has been a good thing.

I thought one should have the attitude of ‚What do you care what other people think!‘

In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher.

The best advice comes from people who don’t give advice.

Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

The reason I became 297 pounds is because that was comfortable. What was very uncomfortable was running. What was very uncomfortable was being on a diet. What was very uncomfortable was trying to face things that I didn’t want to face. And I also realized, when I was really big, I had no growth. Why? Because I was living comfortable.

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

Some people can just let things go, but I can’t, especially if there’s something that worries me or makes me sad.

Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.

Relationships are the hallmark of the mature person.

Face your fears and doubts, and new worlds will open to you.

Experience teaches only the teachable.

The best book, like the best speech, will do it all – make us laugh, think, cry and cheer – preferably in that order.

I’m super serious about music. That’s, like, the only thing I’m serious about.

I’m inconsistent, even to myself.

What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.

For a long time I was scared I’d find out I was like my mother.

The giving of love is an education in itself.

An actor is supposed to be a sensitive instrument.

Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them.

You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.

I just want to be myself.

My experience of malaria was just taking anti-malarials, which give you strange dreams, because I don’t want to get malaria.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

I can get where some scientists would say comedians are crazy. What you have to understand: A lot of comedians are dealing with a dark passion. A lot of these are guys coming from a tumultuous life, including myself. Some people need outlets, a way to express yourself.

The wisdom of the wise and the experience of the ages are perpetuated by quotations.

I’ve been around longer than most of my fans have been alive.

Millions of people live their entire lives without finding themselves. But it is something I must do.

There weren’t a lot of career opportunities in crazy-fast hardcore punk, so you didn’t have a lot of ambition, just the love and passion to play music with your friends.

In my heart, I am always a Raider.

Fighting football, not serenity football – that is what I like.

Movies were invented for Jimmy Cagney, and he was invented for the movies. A perfect match.

It’s getting harder to make decisions to just want to do something to work… I’m trying to find things that are extremely challenging or mean something to me deeply.

I say, beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

Yes, the Bible should be taught in our schools because it is necessary to understand the Bible if we are to truly understand our own culture and how it came to be. The Bible has influenced every part of western culture from our art, music, and history, to our sense of fairness, charity, and business.

To meditate means to go home to yourself. Then you know how to take care of the things that are happening inside you, and you know how to take care of the things that happen around you.

To be radical, an empiricism must neither admit into its constructions any element that is not directly experienced, nor exclude from them any element that is directly experienced.

An employer of mine back in the ’80s was kind enough to take me on after a rough patch, and it made a big difference in my life that I knew I was the sort of person who showed up on time. It’s a basic tell of character.

The album requires a certain focus of mine that I can’t really explain – let’s just say it’s all I can really do while I’m doing it.

I need to do well and show I’m a worthy driver in F1.

Crankiness is at the essence of all comedy. My wife and I were discussing the different types of cranky. There’s entertaining cranky, annoying cranky, angry cranky.

Without football, my life is worth nothing.

Man becomes his most creative during war.

We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.

I love crime, I love mysteries, and I love ghosts.

You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.

What could I say to you that would be of value, except that perhaps you seek too much, that as a result of your seeking you cannot find.

A child wants things to be a certain way. When you get to be an adult, you just understand that some people are good, some are not, and you can’t be naive.

Anything that encourages people to pick up an instrument and play, I’m fully behind.