I’m always surprised when people respond positively to what I am saying, given its seriousnessness and strange nature.

Nothing is worth doing unless the consequences may be serious.

If you do not expect the unexpected you will not find it, for it is not to be reached by search or trail.

On one of my last days at school, the headmaster said I would either end up in prison or become a millionaire. That was quite a startling prediction, but in some respects, he was right on both counts!

I have written a book. This will come as quite a shock to some. They didn’t think I could read, much less write.

At 57, to have a No. 1 album, I wasn’t expecting it.

I can honestly say – and it’s a big surprise to me – that I have never had a dream about being on the moon.

When it comes to the qualifications that we should demand of our president, to start with, we need someone who will take the job seriously.

Put a love note in his shaving kit before he leaves on a business trip.

Yes, I’m always – I’m always surprised when you make a film and you live with it a while and you put it out, you never dream that anybody is ever going to want to really see it.

Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.

When we got into office, the thing that surprised me most was to find that things were just as bad as we’d been saying they were.

He who is not just is severe, he who is not wise is sad.

When I put out ‚Video Games‘ in May 2011, it was a 5:25-minute love song; I was surprised when a lot of people said they were listening to it. I was surprised when it went to the radio, without me even knowing how something like that even happens!

If you’re serious, you really understand that it’s important that you laugh as much as possible and admit that you’re the funniest person you ever met. You have to laugh. Admit that you’re funny. Otherwise, you die in solemnity.

Europeans are much more serious than we are in America because they think that a good place to discuss intellectual matters is a beer party.

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend – and he’s a priest.

I’m very, very serious – I’m serious enough not to take myself too seriously. That means I can be completely wedded to the moment. But when I leave that moment, I want to be completely wedded to the next moment.

The secret to humor is surprise.

At seventy-seven it is time to be in earnest.

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

People tend to play in their comfort zone, so the best things are achieved in a state of surprise, actually.

When I came to Delhi and noticed an insider view, I felt what it was, and I was surprised to see it. It seemed as if dozens of separate governments are running at the same time in one main government. It appeared that everyone has its own fiefdom.

Better understated than overstated. Let people be surprised that it was more than you promised and easier than you said.

Society is always taken by surprise at any new example of common sense.

The wild Indian power of escaping observation, even where there is little or no cover to hide in, was probably slowly acquired in hard hunting and fighting lessons while trying to approach game, take enemies by surprise, or get safely away when compelled to retreat.

I must have been one of the least surprised people on earth on September 11. I felt very braced for that. I knew something like that was going to come.

When I did ‚Bird,‘ it was a surprise to some people, first because I wasn’t in it and second because most of the films I’d been doing were cop movies or westerns or adventure films, so to be doing one about Charlie Parker, who was a great influence on American music, was a great thrill for me.

Growing old has been the greatest surprise of my life.

I have my own vocabulary. I love linguistics. That surprises people.

I started writing at the kitchen table after midnight. It took ten months to finish that first book; I sent it to a publisher and I got some kind of prize, so it was like a dream – I was surprised to find it happening.

I had not expected ‚A Brief History of Time‘ to be a best seller.

If you pretend to be good, the world takes you very seriously. If you pretend to be bad, it doesn’t. Such is the astounding stupidity of optimism.

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

I try to do something the audience might not have seen before. Like if I’m gonna kiss a girl I wanna kiss her like a girl has never been kissed. Like maybe I would kick her legs out from under her and catch her right before she hits the ground and then kiss her.

Everything that is new or uncommon raises a pleasure in the imagination, because it fills the soul with an agreeable surprise, gratifies its curiosity, and gives it an idea of which it was not before possessed.

People are always coming up to me and saying, ‚I heard your dad’s speech, and it’s really great.‘ And they’ll mention some place I didn’t even know my dad was going to.

A sudden bold and unexpected question doth many times surprise a man and lay him open.

How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put ‚page 2.‘

Men are convinced of your arguments, your sincerity, and the seriousness of your efforts only by your death.

Brad was a huge surprise to me. I think we were both the last two people who were looking for a relationship. I certainly wasn’t. I was quite content to be a single mom with Mad.

To Sun-tzu and the ancient Chinese, doing something extraordinary had little effect without a setup of something ordinary. You had to mix the two – to fix your opponent’s expectations with some banal, ordinary maneuver, a comfortable pattern that they would then expect you to follow.

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.

We may be surprised at the people we find in heaven. God has a soft spot for sinners. His standards are quite low.

Even though I’m known as a pop musician, I have a seriousness about what I do.

I don’t need you to be funny. I don’t want to be entertained.

The Occupy movement is – it was a big surprise.

It was like being in the eye of a hurricane. You’d wake up in a concert and think, Wow, how did I get here?

A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.

No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader. No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader.