I know a man who doesn’t pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

When I was 16… I worked in a pet store. And they fired me because… they had three snakes in there, and one day I braided them.

Corpses are more fit to be thrown out than is dung.

We should all grow our own food and do our own waste processing, we really should.

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I’m home now. But leave a message and I’ll call when I’m out.

I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt.

When I was an orphan, I was the richest kid at the orphanage because everyone else was complaining about not having anything. But when I discovered that you could get two cents for a Coca-Cola bottle, I would follow people around who were drinking it and ask them if they were almost through with it.

All the waste in a year from a nuclear power plant can be stored under a desk.

I have a company, and I’ve got to think about that. I’m trying to do my best there, and that’s a much harder task. We recycle as much as possible, and we conserve. But I’ve always been one to save everything – I even walk up stairs on the very inside or the very outside to not wear out the tread.

In California, they don’t throw their garbage away – they make it into TV shows.

Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.

There must be a reason why some people can afford to live well. They must have worked for it. I only feel angry when I see waste. When I see people throwing away things that we could use.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.